I spent the last couple of days in Ban(n)ister World, hoping to hang genetic matches on the family tree. It’s a game that often requires research and patience, digging into the lives of total strangers that might have  been close relatives if circumstances had been different. The tree also includes my closest adopted relatives that I grew up with, and has now exploded to over 15,300 people, with a degree of duplication. With a lot of work searching Facebook, combing obituaries, and comparing other Ancestry.com trees, I was able to identify third cousins Angie Lane Janow, her brother Richard Lane, and Brenda Lee Irelan Smith. In the process, I’m also trusting the accuracy of other researchers and the connections they have found in playing their own version of the “Match Game.”

“You must be in Ban(n)ister World,” I heard my wife say as I retreated into my office. She teases me about my personal historical curiosity. Ironically, my first wife was a hobby genealogist, but I showed little interest since my tree at that time was strictly adopted relatives. It’s just been a couple of years now since I’ve uncovered my biological family. DNA testing provided me with hundreds of matches at varying degrees of “closeness.” I’ve since become somewhat obsessed with connecting the dots with all these people that aren’t really close at all. Does it mean I want to be close? Not necessarily, but I have found some friendly relationships in the process. They’ve been very supportive about my sudden intrusion into their life-long Ban(n)ister family ties. 

The “Match Game” never ends as new people submit to Ancestry or 23andMe DNA testing. I have taken some lengthy breaks frustrated by dead-ends and lack of motivation. In many ways I feel like it’s just busy work, justified by hours of free time in retirement. I’m not really sure what I’m searching for anymore? I know the identity of my birth parents and those closest to them. However, I’ve yet to have any acknowledgement from the bio-mother or her children. Her parents and siblings have all passed, so she’s the only one left that holds the secrets of my birth. The “Match Game” will probably never reveal any of these closely held mysteries, but I’ll keep trying.