Today, my birth father would have been 93. He took his life nearly 13-years ago, although I didn’t know he existed at the time. I was in touch with one of his daughters (my half-sister) today, who reminded me that we had our first phone call 6-years ago tomorrow. She had five sisters at the time, but only four are still alive. The only brother died tragically as a teenager. I discovered the connection through Ancestry, having already known the name of my birth mother.
That first call was not as awkward as I envisioned. I thought for sure she would think that I was a stalker of sorts. Instead, it became comfortable as we explored the possibility. A few calls later, we were ready to call each other brother and sister – I refer to her as “Fav” to distinguish her from the sister that I grew up with, who was also adopted. Unlike “Fav” we have no genetic connection, but rather a lifetime of memories and a common love for the couple that raised us. They are my real mom and dad.
I first met “Fav’s” Bannister family in their hometown of Scipio, Indiana on December 26, 2018. Her mother was gracious enough to welcome me despite the awkward circumstances. I was the result of a “high-school fling” prior to their marriage that she was not aware. Her mom was apparently an older classmate of my bio-mother. Four of the five sisters were there to meet my wife and I, including one that passed a few years back. I’ve yet to meet the fifth but came close a few months ago. The mother recently died, as did my bio-mom, who sadly I also never met.
“Fav” came from our second face-to-face meeting at Lambert’s Cafe in Foley, Alabama, home of the “throwed rolls.” It was a preferred dining spot for all of our parents when they vacationed down south. That initial meeting was on September 2, 2020. She brought along her friend Tish for support and a sign that read “Favorite Sister,” I held up the sign in a photo of the two of us that she used to taunt her siblings. Needless to say, my adopted sister did not appreciate the claim when she saw it on Facebook.
“Fav” and I have met on two other occasions, but keep in touch with text messages, especially during football season. She works for the University of Alabama and an avid “Roll Tide” fan. One of our visits was at the Tuscaloosa campus, where I also met her son. She did message me today on her father’s birthday, so these memories are fresh in my mind. I never met him, but have some photos, stories, and his Marine’s spoon to remind me of his major influence on my life. Here’s to all my six sisters, past and present. Oh, and there’s one more on my birth mother’s side that won’t acknowledge me, but that’s another story. Regardless, they are all favorites!
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