I spent some time in the men’s clothing business, while living in Austin, Texas.  It seemed like a good idea, since for most of my business career I was known as a “Dapper Dan.”  I owned hundreds of ties, custom suits, french-cuff shirts, silk pocket scarves, suspenders, and cuff-links – the works!  i loved to get dressed up in the morning, and would usually lay out my clothes the night before. I dressed for success, but by the time I got to Austin, success had unfortunately passed me by.  It’s  actually the time frame that I started thinking about retirement.  Selling men’s clothing pushed me over the edge!

First of all, it was too damn hot in Austin to wear finery.  If I had a business meeting in the downtown area where I worked, I would have to have to leave a half-hour early, duck into some air conditioned lobbies along the way, and arrive early to cool down.  Selling a suit in Austin, Texas was as close to selling swim trunks to Eskimos as one can possibly get!  Most business people dressed casually, with no ties, silver buckles, and cowboy boots.  Attorneys and Bankers were the exception, so if you saw someone in a suit you knew almost exactly what they did for a living.  We also sold a fair amount of tuxedos for the two or three awards events that maintained a tradition of formality.  Bankers, lawyers, and successful entrepreneurs were my clients.

I could dress with the best of them, and show them a few tricks.  If I had a weakness in style, it was my shoes.  I tend to shuffle when I walk, so my shoes always look a bit beat-up.  I spent time at all the shoe shine stands, where they knew me by name, but I never was able to maintain that high-gloss look.  To be honest, I also think there was a side of me that rebelled against shiny shoes.  I wanted to feel comfortable in the business environment without a tie, but dressing up in the morning was like putting on a suit of armor, preparing for battle.  I was not in my element if I wasn’t properly adorned.

It was a long year of selling suits before I finally got a suitable position for my skills.  I was very grateful to get out of the retail business.  There were too many clients that just wouldn’t buy the whole package and had little sense of taste in clothing.  Maybe, they too, were rebelling against the fashion world, with ties that didn’t match and suits that didn’t fit,

Probably the best moment of retirement, was taking all my clothing finery to Goodwill.  I’ve kept a couple of suits, sport coats, and ties for special occasions.  It was the wedding reception that I went to a few days ago, that forced me back into a sport coat.  I did not wear a tie.  I couldn’t help but notice the lack of effort in getting dressed for this event.  In fact, one of the biggest fashion faux pas is brown shoes with a black suit, tuxedo, or slacks.  It reminded me of this poem I wrote a few years ago with thoughts of  Z.Z. Topps’ “Sharp Dressed Man (cue song):”

 

Tux

All dressed up,

Someplace to go.

I look good,

I just know.

 .

Heads will turn,

Smiles abound.

They’re staring at me,

When I turn around.

 .

I look so grand,

I simply can’t lie.

Crisp, starched white shirt.

Gift wrapped in a bow tie.

 .

Onyx studs,

Cool cuff links.

I look like a million,

Everyone thinks.

 .

Pocket scarf,

Watch on a chain.

Martini in hand,

Feeling no pain.

 .

Black tuxedo,

Satin lapels.

My cologne,

How good it smells.

 

Tan face,

Manicured nails.

I’m a spectacle,

In top hat and tails.

.

 

Not a hair out of place,

And none of it missing.

To be at my side,

Women are wishing.

.

Cummerbund,

Stylish Suspenders.

The envy of,

Both genders.

 .

Then I realize.

I missed all the clues,

People are laughing,

At my brown shoes.

 .

copyright 2012 johnstonwrites.com