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Category: POEMS (Page 29 of 30)

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Retirement is not without Hassles: What day is it? #38

April 3, 2017 / / 1 Comment

I spent Sunday writing posts about sports under my “Old Sport Shorts” moniker.  I try to maintain balance between retirement issues and my love of sports, but many hours of watching games at Buffalo Wild Wings this weekend threw off that balance.  I was not even sure what day it was, as Friday transitioned seamlessly into Saturday,  with me sitting at the same table, although with different company each day. I got  a little shot of college life with a former co-worker and his son on Friday and some time with my fellow retirees on Saturday.  I ended the weekend mostly alone writing, watching the women’s NCAA championship, Cubs vs. Cards opening night baseball, and Portland Timbers  soccer. As a result of my sports weekend, I missed out on the new “Beauty and the Beast” movie and shopping.  I did spend some time with my wife and the dogs each morning, but essentially it was a weekend with the boys.

I can’t say it was a fruitful sports weekend since all my teams lost. but I did enjoy the pretzels, beer, and companionship.  If I were going to work this morning, there would be plenty to talk about around the “water cooler,”   Instead, I’m sitting here watching the movie “Passengers” that my wife rented over the weekend to occupy some of her loneliness while I was in “Sports World.

This Monday morning is about as busy as it’s been in retirement.  I have to take my wife’s car to the Oregon DMV for license plate renewal tests, drop some paperwork off at the doctor’s office, visit the chiropractor for an adjustment, and take the dogs to the vet.  I also have a meeting with an illustrator about collaborating on a a children’s book. That’s five things in one day!  One thing is usually my limit.  I also have a honey-do list of ordering tickets, upholstery, and plantation shutters.  I was able to get the knives sharpened over the weekend, utilizing a mobile service that came to our home.  I am a bit “in the doghouse,” agreeing to going to a college baseball game on Tuesday night instead of cooking.  My wife had already bought all the ingredients, and seemed a bit disappointed in my choice of ball park over kitchen.  After all, I’m planning on also being at Dodger Stadium on Wednesday night for a game against the Padres.  She will be stuck with two days of business meetings while I play.  I’m not putting any points in the Love Bank, just withdrawals.

I do like the fact that I’m keeping busy, active and hassle-free.   My wife has also mentioned how much happier I seem to be in retirement.  I think it’s just relative, since I was miserable my last five years of work.  I’ve finally arrived at the stage of life that allows me to basically do what I want.  However, I still remain cautious about upsetting the working wife by giving the impression that I’m not contributing to the household in the process.  I didn’t write down a couple of her repair “recommendations” on Friday, and was reminded of my lack of productivity.  She probably isn’t aware of how productive I’ve been on writing.

Here’s a little poem to get you off to a thoughtful start this week:

Time

The older we get,
The faster time goes by.
We can’t slow things down,
No matter how we try.
.
The clock keeps on ticking,
You can’t make it stop.
The countdown of life,
Continues to drop.
.
We can spring forward,
Or even fall back.
Leap an extra day,
And be on a fast track.
.
Time can fly by,
Or wait seemingly forever.
So until it’s over,
Never say never.
.
You can have no time,
Or plenty it seems.
But whatever you do,
Make time for dreams.
.
We can take our time,
Even have it on our side.
Avoid running out of it,
Or those dreams have died.
.
You can start a timer,
Manage a time table.
But it can’t be bottled,
With a time sensitive label.
.
You can believe in Time Travel,
Or the way-back machine.
You just can’t go back,
To being a teen.

.

You can’t buy it, steal it,
Or save it for later.
For extra time together,
No gift is greater.

.

We can waste time,
Even try to kill it.
And watch it pass by,
But – still – it will never sit.
.
You can carry a time piece,
Glance at your wrist.
But any time wasted,
Is also time missed.
.

Copyright 2010 johnstonwrites.com

 

Old Sport Shorts: Once a Blazer, Always a Blazer #37

April 2, 2017 / / 0 Comments

When I was in high school back in Elkhart, Indiana, our unique team mascot was the Blue Blazer, a funny looking character with flaming hair and a corkscrew nose, dressed in blue and riding on a lightening bolt.  I’ve never seen another mascot like it, and only know of a few teams identified with any variation of the Blazer nickname.   A friend of mine dressed for each game in blue and wore a paper mache’ helmet with the long yellow, twisted nose.  He was “Mister B,” one of the first male cheerleaders that I ever knew.

I’ve always been intrigued with team nicknames, and knew the moniker of most schools across the state.  One of my favorites was the Frankfort Hot Dogs, but my own grade school also had a very unique name, the Rice Krispies.  I’m sure Kellogg’s was not impressed, but I don’t recall a lawsuit over copyright infringement.  Rice University in Texas are the Owls – “wise” not to have taken the name of a company with lots of lawyers.  Along the lines of the lines of the Rice Krispies, for those with an appetite here in Oregon we have the Tillamook Cheesemakers.

Come to think of it, I’ve only gone to schools with unique nicknames.  I first went to college at Albion and became a Briton, and then graduated from Indiana University as a Hoosier.  Their are no other schools with those names, although either really made any sense.  A “Briton” is a native or inhabitant of Great Briton, and Albion was in Michigan.  A “Hoosier” was supposedly popularized by an 1833 poem from John Finley called “The Hoosier’s Nest.”  Even as a fellow poet, I was not impressed.

I think it was fate that led me to Portland, Oregon to be a fan of the NBA Trail Blazers.  The Trail Blazers nick-name was apparently the result of a contest back in 1970, established just after my graduation as a Blue Blazer.   I’m not sure the story of the Blue Blazer name, but I know we didn’t the history of Lewis and Clark, the original trailblazers, to provide a creative source of inspiration.  I find it remarkable that 172 people submitted the name “Trail Blazers” as part of the contest, so there’s no way to provide proper individual credit.  At the time, there were supposedly no other major Professional or University sports teams using either Blazers or Trail Blazers.  I’m sure that was thoroughly checked out by the team attorneys before the name was officially  adopted.  Obviously, they were not familiar with the Elkhart Blue Blazers.  it just goes to show how innovative that nickname has become.

The University of Alabama-Birmingham was founded in 1969, but didn’t start their intercollegiate athletic program until 1978.  They too named their sports teams the Blazers.  I then quickly skimmed the list of college team nicknames and found the Saint Benedict’s College (Minnesota) Blazers, Valdosta State Blazers, and Vincennes University Trailblazers.  I noted that Vincennes, founded in 1801, named their teams after the inspiration of George Rogers Clark who resided in Indiana after his military career.  Maybe the Elkhart Blue Blazers stole the idea from them and the Portland Trailblazers didn’t do as thorough of search as they thought?  After all, George Rogers Clark’s younger brother was the William Clark (Lewis & Clark Expedition 1804-1806), the original Portland Trailblazer.

As I examined a Wikipedia list of college nicknames more extensively, I had to laugh at Chicago’s Shimer College Flaming Smelts.  Founded in 1853, it has fewer than 150 students and no more than 12 students per class, according to their website.   I found no reference to a sports team, just a colorful illustration of a Lake Michigan smelt flying out of an explosion with its black top-hat on fire.   I couldn’t help but think of the Blue Blazer’s hair on fire.  I also stumbled across another unusual nickname, the Presbyterian College Blue Hose.  I suppose it’s no different than calling the Chicago White Sox the “Pale Hose.”  I’m of course being silly here but I couldn’t help but think of “Mister B” in his silly head gear and blue tights.  I also noted that of all the college team nicknames, only a relative few didn’t end in a plural “s” like the Blue Hose.  Just for fun, I’ve listed the others below and highlighted what I consider to be the major programs:

ASA College (Miami) Silver Storm

Bethany College Bison

Bucknell University Bison

Cankdeska Cikana Community College C4

Central College (Iowa) Dutch

Cornell University Big Red

Cumberland University Phoenix

Dartmouth College Big Green

Delta State University Statesmen and Lady Statesmen

Denison University Big Red

Elon University Phoenix

Greensboro College Pride

Harding University Bison

Harvard University Crimson

Hobart College Statesmen

Hofstra University Pride

Hope College Flying Dutchmen

Howard University Bison

Illinois Fighting Illini

Lake Erie College Storm

Lebanon Valley College Flying Dutchmen

Lesley University Lynx

Loyola University of New Orleans Wolfpack

Luther College Norse

Marshall University Thundering Herd

Massachusetts Minutemen

McDaniel College Green Terror

Navy Midshipmen

Nevada Wolf Pack

North Carolina State University Wolfpack

North Dakota State University Bison

North Texas Mean Green

Northern Kentucky University Norse

Notre Dame Fighting Irish

Oak Hills Christian College Wolfpack

Oberlin College Yeomen

Palm Beach Atlantic Sailfish

Presbyterian College Blue Hose

Rhodes College Lynx

Saint Francis University Red Flash

Saint John’s University Red Storm

Simpson College Storm

Slippery Rock University The Rock

Southeastern Oklahoma State University Savage Storm

Southeastern University Fire

Southern California Women of Troy (Trojans – men)

Southern Nazarene University Crimson Storm

Southern New Hampshire Penmen

Springfield College Pride

Stanford University Cardinal

Syracuse University Orange

Tulsa Golden Hurricane

Union College Dutchmen and Dutchwomen

Wellesley College Blue

College of William and Mary Tribe

I know the Wikipedia list was not complete, because my alma mater, Albion College, was not listed.  Albion is a lot bigger school than Shimer College, so I was offended.  I hope you weren’t equally annoyed if I missed your alma mater, or didn’t highlight your school as a major program. After all, even the Portland Trail Blazers did not acknowledge the Vincennes University Trail Blazers back in 1970 when the team was named. In all fairness, I think the Vincennes was only a junior college back then, so they may not have yet labeled their team, and may even have copied Elkhart or Portland in establishing their team identity.  Only the 21 major programs listed chose to eliminate the “s” from their team name.  That fact alone makes each of them unique, thinking outside the box.  I think you’ll find the same to be true of Professional teams.  I will wait to explore that list, but in the meantime “Go Blazers.”

Retirement is not without Hassles: Spring Break #34

March 31, 2017 / / 0 Comments

Remember when your life used to revolve around spring break?  Maybe it still does?  It was when you took at least half of your vacation time, with the other half used to extend the time off around holidays.  Almost everyone can recall an eventful spring break vacation, when you packed up the car and adventured to new places.  Well, retirement is a new place, and it takes preparation and planning to get there.  This is why I encourage practice in the years leading up to this goal, and why many companies give you more vacation time as a benefit of staying with them.

Try to imagine what a day of retirement would be for you – what would you do with your time?  What would a week be like, a month be like, or a year be like?  Put some thought into a weekly schedule, and write down what each day would involve if you weren’t spending that time working.  This is a very important aspect of practicing for retirement.

What would your life be like without spring break, other vacations, holidays, and weekends?  A life where every day is an exercise in personal discipline.  What time would you get up in the morning?  When would you go to bed?  I was comfortable establishing a routine, similar to the routine that I had while working.  Maybe you would structure your day differently?  I get up just before my working wife awakes, do some stretching and strength exercises, take the dogs outside for a short walk, go for a three-mile run to gather my thoughts, write those thoughts down in this blog, and then take the dogs for a longer walk down to Starbucks, where we all enjoy a treat.  Yes, you still have to reward yourself in retirement, after all there are no bonuses, overtime, or employee of the month programs.  There are incentives, like travel, if you can afford it, and the pleasure of knowing that you don’t have to go to work tomorrow.

The good news is that all your time is now yours.  The kids are hopefully grown, you can choose how involved in the lives of grandchildren you want to be, and there’s a whole world out there for you to explore, whether through reading, video, or visiting.   There are movies to watch, documentaries and biographies to ponder, sporting events to enjoy, new acquaintances to make, and old friendships to renew.  I’m excited about all of these wonderful opportunities.  My life is now not consumed with getting a promotion, buying a better car or a bigger home, paying for college educations, or simply being the best at what I do.  I’ve already admitted that as a competitive person I’ve had moments of envy when someone else finds a better way to fill a day of retirement.  Sometimes I wish I had saved more, made more, or had more. In general I’m content, however, in having good health and some financial resources to fulfill some of my bucket list.

During my run this morning, I could actually see the sun come up.  It wasn’t totally dark and overcast.  I could see where all that rain was doing its magic.  Trees and flowers were blooming – spring was in the air.  It was what made me think of spring break and new beginnings, like my venture into retirement.  I just had a complete physical with positive results and I’m looking forward to at least a week of travel in each of the remaining months this year.  It didn’t even really dawn on me until just now that today is Friday.

I was in court-side, half-court seats last night for the Blazers game against the Rockets,  I’m not sure you could really have better seats for a basketball game.  The Ducks are in the Final Four against North Carolina tomorrow, as are the Zags who play South Carolina.  These are the events that now dominate my calendar, not business meetings.  Next week I’ll visit Chavez Ravine, Dodger Stadium, for the first time, joining my wife on her business trip.  I’ll probably also catch a tour bus, while she covers her appointments.

Life is good and retirement is great.  I’ll let you know if there are any hassles.  In the meantime, I’ll leave you with another poem:

 

Retire

.

I’ve spent all my life,

Working for Friday.

Soon every day,

Will be a Saturday.

.

No more Monday’s,

No more Hump Days.

I’m about to enter,

The retirement phase.

.

I saved some money,

Have a company plan.

Will I spend my Saturday’s,

Working on my tan?

.

With any luck,

I’ll have enough.

So cutting back,

Won’t be too tough.

.

So how will I fill,

Each waking day?

Will I be lazy?

And just play.

.

I begin a new life,

Be the boss of me.

There’s a whole world,

Out there to see.

.

Maybe new hobbies?

Volunteer some hours?

More education?

Smell the flowers?

.

Watch more sports?

Write more silly rhyme?

Catch up on reading?

Lose track of time?

.

And I realize,

That there will be.

An occasional bad day,

Where I won’t be free.

.

Because the thing,

That I like alot.

Those good days working,

Can’t beat bad days not.

.

A perpetual weekend,

Or maybe the beginning?

As the years go by,

And my hair keeps thinning.

.

Health matters,

Appointments to keep.

And those concerns,

That won’t let me sleep.

.

But the fact remains,

There’s still a perk.

I won’t have to get up,

And go to work.

.

Copyright May 2015

johnstonwrites.com

Retirement is not without Hassles: Grandkids and Pets #33

March 30, 2017 / / 14 Comments

Retirement means spending more time with kids and pets.  Who needs a hobby when you’ve got these responsibilities?   My son and grandkids live in Florida so I’m not getting those impromptu babysitting calls that many retirees actually enjoy.  Maybe there’s a reason I live so far away?  I just visited in February and will be back in July.  I’ll also see them again in August when we all will meet in San Francisco.  I’m honestly trying to evenly spread my travel time between family and leisure.

Yes, I’m spending more time with the pets.  These are my daily companions who are just getting used to me infringing on their quiet time.    I used to have co-workers; Now, all I have two dogs and a cat to complain to all day.  They stalk me, hoping for food, to go outside for a walk, or better yet a ride in the car.  Tally, who’s a seven year old black Schnauzer, is not trustworthy, so she’s always on a leash when we’re outside. This morning, she broke free, and I chased her down to Starbucks.  I try to take them there a couple of times a week, since they usually get a treat.    Apparently, Tally felt that she could go there on her own!  Tinker is our older Schnauzer, who is a little less venturesome, worried that there won’t be food if she doesn’t stay close by.  I wrote a humorous poem a few years ago about Tinker’s  voracious appetite:

 

Tinker

.

We have a dog named Tinker,

Eats everything in sight.

She wants a treat each morning,

Gets ham most every night.

.

She’s at my feet when dining,

Just waiting for her share.

I simply can’t ignore,

Her impatient stare.

.

When we take her on a walk,

Her nose is on the ground.

Searching every crack,

For a morsel to be found.

.

Ice cream is a favorite,

She licks it off the stick.

And if you want some for yourself,

You better eat it quick.

.

When we order Chinese,

Her tail begins to wag.

And she starts to whimper,

When she sees the bag.

.

She wants her Fortune cookie,

In no mood to chase her ball.

She’s been known to eat them,

Plastic wrapper and all.

.

On the morning after,

When I went to scoop.

You’ll never guess what I found?

A fortune in her poop.

.

Copyright 2009 johnstonwrites.com

Retirement is not without Hassles: On The Beach #31

March 28, 2017 / / 0 Comments

I’m still trying to learn the technical aspects of this Go Daddy formatted site.  I will try to cut and paste something, or simply try to undo a mistake, and it leads to frustration.  Computers are sensitive animals and often they don’t want to work when you do.  If I had trouble in the past, I would simply ask someone else at work, but now I’m all alone and have to solve my own computer issues.  I always seem to feel out-of-date when I’m on the computer, knowing that some nine year old could easily solve the problem.  Retirement equals getting old equals hassles – the silver-hair formula for frustration.  In my pre-retirement days at the office, I would often try to pause, take a deep breath, and try to put myself in a pleasant place – like the beach.

I fondly recall those vacation days, escape from work by definition.  Now we have to worry about skin cancer, a flabby pale body, and layers of sun screen.  While I was enjoying the sun and sand, I often wondered how all the hundreds of people around me could simply take the day off?  Was anybody working?   I remember thinking, as well, that being “on the beach” was also a kind phrase for being out of work.  Did people think I was not working?  They will be correct the next time I pitch my umbrella in the sand.  We’re, in fact, headed to Maui in about three weeks, and I’m just looking forward to getting away from this wet drizzle that we experience here in Portland.   I had a little fun a few years ago writing this humorous poem about what we see at the beach:

The Beach

.

Sand and surf,

Light breeze.

Squawking birds,

Life at ease.

.

Beach chair,

Little on.

Bright sunshine,

Troubles gone.

.

Rolling waves,

Puffy white clouds.

Blue sky above,

Away from crowds.

.

Fresh air,

Nice scenery

Positive thoughts,

Feeling so free.

.

Peaceful sigh,

A couple strolls by.

You give them a smile,

And tell them, “hi.”

.

Out of nowhere.

A frightening sight.

I knew right away,

Something’s not right.

.

He’s bending over,

His trunks riding down.

Suddenly my smile,

Turned into a frown.

.

What’s worse than a shark,

When you’re taking a swim?

Checking out her,

And getting butt crack from him.

.

 

Copyright 2012 johnstonwrites.com

Retirement is not without Hassles: My Day – Alone Time #30

March 27, 2017 / / 0 Comments

I published my first “Retirement is not without Hassles” post 12 weeks ago today.  At first, I was excited with all the comments I was getting – then I discovered that most all of them were spam.  It’s hard to know who is reading my words. Last night we watched the movie “Julie and Julia,” the story of a blogger, Julie, and her efforts to prepare all of Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking recipes in a one year span of time.   It had a happy ending with Julie eventually seeing more and more activity on her site and securing a lucrative publishing contract.  I think that all of us who blog have this fantasy of fame that we are trying to achieve, but unfortunately only a few of us succeed.  With this in mind, I’m satisfied with doing this solely for myself, enjoying the satisfaction of putting words on a page.

I am convinced that I’m what they call an “extro-introvert.”  I enjoy spending time with others but I also crave my alone time.  Today is MY DAY.  It’s as good as any Friday or Saturday and definitely a benefit of retirement.  While I was working, I certainly found time alone, but it was tarnished with guilt about not working.  Today this is my work.  I haven’t had a morning alone in well over a week, and I miss it.  We were traveling to see family and then my wife got the flu, staying home from work for two days prior to the weekend.  I enjoy her company as an extrovert, but needed my time alone as an introvert.  I’m very good at doing nothing, but I need to write about my thoughts and feelings.  I haven’t been able to do that for the last two weeks.

Yes, I love my wife, enjoy watching movies with her, and want to hear about her daily accomplishments.  I look forward to our Wednesday date night, cook for her on Tuesday night, and share my running time with her and our dogs on the weekend.  However, Monday morning has become favorite time of the week.  She’s at work, doing what she wants to do, and I’m alone with the dogs and my computer.  Hopefully, some of my best writing will happen on Monday mornings, a time that I used to dread in my working days.  I even enjoy doing housework on Monday afternoon – something I won’t be doing today because after being home and sick for several days, my wife started to notice the shortcomings of my cleaning skills.  At her suggestion, I had to clean on Saturday, instead.

I did watch a lot of basketball over the past week.  “March Madness” was filled with firsts.  The Oregon Ducks made the Final Four for the first time since 1939, when they won the very first College Basketball Championship.  The South Carolina Gamecocks earned their first Final Four appearance ever!  Indiana University hired a new basketball coach, making March headlines despite a disappointing season.  Finally, the  Indianapolis Crispus Attucks high school basketball team won it’s first Indiana State title since 1959, when they were led to an undefeated season by round-ball legend Oscar Robertson.  The “Big O” himself, at age 78, was there to hand out the medals – cool.   These milestones probably don’t mean anything to anyone but me, but since it’s MY DAY I get to reflect on what’s meaningful in history to me.

When I write about the hassles of retirement, I’m sure you realize I’m in most cases being facetious.   Hassles, or what an optimist calls challenges, are simply a part of life.  It’s just that in retirement they seem to be magnified since there are no work distractions anymore.  I could lament on the two doctor appointments that I have this week, but I’m also looking forward to five MY DAYS in a row, followed by the weekend of OUR TIME with my wife.

My Day

There’s reason to change,

The days of the week.

Since I no longer work,

They need a slight tweak.

.

There’s no more Holidays,

Every day’s the same.

It’s only on my calendar,

If there’s a Big Game.

.

Weekends are now,

Just another day.

Since in retirement,

We don’t wait to play.

.

Mondays no longer,

Are filled with dread.

No clock to punch,

Just stay in bed.

.

You don’t wake up,

Thinking “Only Tuesday?”

There’s four more days,

Until it’s Saturday.

.

Hump Day’s gone,

No mid-week trauma.

The week’s half-over,

Has lost its drama.

.

Thursday’s hope,

That when it passes.

“Thank God It’s Friday!”

Proclaim the masses.

.

It disappears,

And you sleep in.

Slips quickly by,

Oh, not again.

.

Where’d Saturday go?

You moan on Sunday.

My weekend’s gone,

It’s almost Monday.

.

Only Pay Day,

Seems rewarding.

Your life is like,

A looped recording.

.

Then you retire,

And begin to reflect.

The seven-day cycle,

Now easy to reject.

.

You don’t look forward,

To it being Friday.

Every day of the week,

Is simply My Day.

.

Copyright 2017 johnstonwrites.com

 

 

Retirement is not without Hassles: Friends and Family #28

March 23, 2017 / / 2 Comments

I just returned from a trip to Indianapolis to see family.  In the process, I also stumbled across a few friends that I hadn’t seen in awhile.  I’d call them “old friends” but that would admit that I’m old, too.  Everyone seems eager to know what retirement is like, especially those that are still working.  To them it’s still that elusive carrot they are chasing.  I’m happy to report to them that every night is a Friday night and every day is a Saturday.

I have found myself envious of adventures that fellow retirees have enjoyed – just like the work days when other’s jobs seemed more glamorous.  It sometimes feels like everyone else has more money and better ideas on how to spend it.  The places they visit are more exciting, and they’ve got something else planned that’s even better!  I listened to a friend of mine talking about a three-week East Coast journey he was about to take to meet up with old friends and “freeload” as much as possible.   The first thing that came to mind was how “lucky” he was to have that much free time for a trip down memory lane and only a very loose plan on “when he would be where.” The funny thing was that I was doing the very same thing that he was about to do – visiting friends and family,   His trip just sounded more adventurous, and I was being envious of something I was already doing.

It’s only been eighty days since I retired, so I guess it really hasn’t sunk in yet.  I have same advantages that all my co-retirees have.  We all have some money, a lot of time, and big plans.  You can’t always keep up with the Jones’ but you can learn to be happy with what you have.  I’m grateful for good health, great love, and freedom.  I wish I could share it with everyone, but no matter where you are in life, there’s always someone better off and another that needs help.  It’s good to be in the middle – to just have average hassles.

Another recent conversation on this trip “back home” was with an old boss who had been retired for a few years, and tired of traveling.  He just built a new home that reminded me of the luxury hotel we were staying in that night.  He’s up-sizing when the rest of us are down-sizing.  I guess I could have been envious of that, as well – but I don’t want to be tired of traveling. My fondest memory of this particular boss was his simple philosophy  to the success of any relationship – whether in the honeymoon or retirement stages of life.   It was just “nine little words” and I wrote a poem about it a few years ago:

I’m Sorry

I was wisely advised,

A long time ago.

Of nine little words,

I needed to know.

 

I’m sorry,

You’re right,

 I’m wrong.

 

In patching a friendship,

Keeping peace with a spouse.

Words that will keep you,

From the dog house.

 

You’re right,

 I’m sorry,

 I’m wrong.

 

Use these nine magic words,

The order is up to you.

Say them with meaning,

Any combination will do.

 

I’m wrong,

 You’re right,

I’m sorry.

 

It’s what to say,

When you’re a jerk.

Healing words,

That really work.

 

I’m wrong.

I’m sorry.

You’re right

 

A lesson to learn,

In the game of life.

Words of wisdom,

Between husband and wife.

 

I’m sorry,

I’m wrong.

You’re right,

 

Say them with meaning,

And often repeat.

I promise these words,

Will lower the heat.

 

You’re right,

 I’m wrong.

I’m sorry,

 

Six combinations,

Nine words any way.

Old fashioned math,

Keeps trouble at bay.

 

You’re right,

 I’m sorry,

 I’m wrong.

 

Always wrong or sorry,

When you have a fight.

Just remember,

You’re never right.

 

I’m sorry,

You’re right,

 I’m wrong.

 

Johnstonwrites.com

Copyright April 2009

Retirement is not without Hassles: Finding Humor in the little things #26

March 15, 2017 / / 39 Comments

If you’re not retired, or still practicing for retirement, you probably have those moments of panic in the morning.  It may be as simple as not being able to find your car keys and you’re late for an important meeting.  My wife, who’s still working, had a panic attack the other morning.  She wanted me to help her find her car keys, and we’re both scrambling around the house checking pockets, drawers, and cars trying to locate them.  I was anxious to get her out the door so I could start my day, so I was happy to help.  After about ten minutes of useless searching, she once again checked her purse.  They were there – just as she’d left them the night before.

.

The Curse

It’s gotta be unique,

Better yet designer.

It’s gotta have pockets,

And a fancy liner.

 

Like high heels,

Forget practical.

Avoid counterfeits,

Pay for the actual.

 

Quality stitching,

With handles tough.

Size does matter,

To hold lots of stuff.

 

What’s all in there?

It weighs a ton.

A potential weapon,

Or is that a gun?

 

It has everything,

You could possibly need.

A family of five,

Potentially feed.

 

An extra pair,

Of underwear?

The necessary tools.

For auto repair?

 

Phone, Computer,

Umbrella and more.

More inventory,

Than an average store.

.

Enough medical supplies,

To cure any disease.

But then you can’t find,

Your car keys.

 

Oh, the convenience,

Of a classy purse.

But a bottomless pit,

Is quite the curse.

.

Copyright 2017 johnstonwrites.com
 

Sometimes I feel like I’m writing a classic Hollywood movie where suddenly the characters break out in song.  In my case, I break out in poetry.  I think you’ll find this to be a common thread throughout my posts.  The bottom line is that what seems like panic one moment many times ends in a laugh.  Let’s always try to find humor in our lives.  It helps us through the hassles.

 

 

Retirement is not without Hassles: The Retirement Prayer #24

March 11, 2017 / / 13 Comments

It’s Saturday morning – a day that used to be very special as the beginning of the weekend.  Instead, as a retiree, it’s just like any other day, but still special.  I began to reminisce a bit about how I used to wish away the week in anticipation of the weekend, and ultimately trying to ruin the weekend by fretting about it passing too quickly.  One of the drawbacks of retirement is that we have to give up weekends, holidays, and vacations.  The good news, however, is that every day can be looked at as a weekend day, holiday, or vacation.  I wrote this humorous little prayer to celebrate the day:

Retirement Prayer

Weekends seem,

To shrink in size.

When work on Monday,

Precariously lies.

 

Two days off,

Seems like one.

As you start to fret,

Once Saturday’s done.

 

When you wake up,

On Sunday morning.

You find yourself,

Already mourning.

 

It’s almost over,

You realize.

You start saying,

Weekend goodbyes.

 

Yes, you still have,

The whole day.

But you can’t help,

Begrudgingly say:

 

“Monday morning,

Will soon be here.

The weekend’s over,

It’s sadly clear.”

 

Next weekend seems,

So far away.

Can’t help but hope,

It’s the next day.

 

At last it comes,

Home late on Friday.

The weekend’s here,

You’re glad to say.

 

Before you know it,

Saturday’s disappeared.

It passed too fast,

As you feared.

 

It’s suddenly Sunday,

You start to worry.

Your weekend off,

Is kind of blurry.

 

It passed you by,

You wish for Friday.

Push through Hump day,

So you can finally play.

 

Focusing forward,

Always looking ahead.

Before you know it,

You’re sadly dead.

 

Life between weekends,

You’ve wished away.

Living for a Holiday,

Dreading the work day.

 

Maybe you’ve said,

“Just can’t face Monday.”

Lord, please let me,

Die very late Sunday.

 

But if I should live,

To be retired.

When work on Monday,

Is not required.

 

Forget this request,

To pass on Sunday.

As Monday becomes,

My favorite day.

 

Lord, let me live,

A long, retired life.

Keep me healthy,

And free from strife

 

Copyright 2017 Johnstonwrites.com

Retirement is not without Hassles: Lucky Me #22

March 7, 2017 / / 0 Comments

Retirement is not without hassles – like the two hours I spent on the phone yesterday about my medical insurance.   However, overall,  I’ve been lucky my entire life, and hopefully this will continue throughout retirement.   Here’s a poem I wrote eight years ago while I was still practicing for retirement.

Lucky Me

I don’t know,

How it came to be.

All my life,

It’s been “Lucky me.”

 

I’m so lucky,

Married and in love.

My life directed,

By angels above.

 

Look years younger,

Most would agree.

A wife I adore,

Who supports me.

 

I’m so lucky,

I’m in the zone.

I got the big half,

Of the wishbone.

 

Las Vegas look out,

I’m on a roll.

My Christmas stocking,

Not filled with coal.

 

Although a bit gray,

I still have my hair.

I’m not confined,

To a wheelchair.

 

I’m so lucky,

When this life is over,

On top of my grave,

Find a four-leaf clover.

 

There’s a falling star,

And a lady bug.

It’ll rub off,

Just give me a hug.

 

I got a medal,

From St. Christopher.

So my good luck,

Will long endure.

 

At  my back,

Is always a breeze.

I get through each day,

With the greatest of ease.

 

A retirement plan,

and 401K.

Financially,

We’re doing OK.

 

I’m not hungry,

Or sleep deprived.

A new granddaughter,

Has just arrived.

 

I own a house,

It’s on a lake.

I’m in good shape,

Most joints don’t ache.

 

Can pay the rent.

Car runs great.

My monthly payments,

Have never been late.

 

I still have both parents,

Who enjoy their own home.

I’ve traveled the world,

From Hong Kong to Rome.

 

Find coins on the ground,

Most every day.

Live in a complex,

Less work-more play.

 

Had a successful career,

And can run every day.

Have lived in Austin,

Since last May.

 

Have a little dog,

Only one of us begs.

And only one of us,

Has four legs.

 

The next lottery prize,

I’ve already won.

Don’t have to shovel,

Get plenty of sun.

 

Never had major surgery,

Or broke any bones.

Have always paid,

Outstanding loans.

 

No allergies

Or problems with my nose.

I’m healthy and happy,

All ten fingers and toes.

 

I can see,

And I can feel.

Never felt desperate,

No need to steal.

 

I’m so lucky,

It’s good to be me.

How much luckier,

Could I be?

 

Copyright 2009 johnstonwrites.com

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