I can barely type on the keyboard after my daily run, with my body filled with adrenaline. My hands shake more than normal before my heart rate begins to settle. The first paragraph every morning requires numerous corrections as I try to turn thoughts into words. It’s probably the best I feel all day as well as my most productive hours. The same was true when I was working. Normally, however, I was in a room where I didn’t have to worry about being disruptive. Today, I’m in a hotel room, as will be the case over the next week here in Las Vegas, and my wife is still trying to sleep. Apparently, there were some noisy neighbors that I was able to somehow sleep-through. Sometimes there are advantages to loss of hearing, but my wife isn’t buying that rationalization. “Get a hearing aid,” continues to be her not so subtle mantra. What?

It used to be “get your hearing checked,” but obviously I’ve proven that it’s more than just ear wax. I actually did get it checked a few years ago as the complaints started, and although they found some issues, it was considered to be normal age related hearing loss. Rock concerts! I don’t think I’ll have that concern at the upcoming Barry Manilow concert, as if I really want to hear “Copacabana.” Perhaps it’s gotten worse, but I don’t want to hear what’s going on next door in a hotel room or our apartment building. We have a small child upstairs that sounds like a herd of elephants as she runs with unbounded energy. I think I’ll wait until we move away from downtown Portland before I invest in new ears. 

I do use closed captioning when I watch television, claiming that I can’t often understand the character accents, particularly British productions. I’m usually at the keyboard anyway, not totally focused on the plot. I end up re-viewing a program several times before I get the full gist of it. I wish I had the CC option at the movie theater, but there I’m forced to pay close attention. I think I just need to pay fuller attention to my wife rather than try to listen while monitoring game scores on my phone. What? In retirement, nothing urgent comes through my phone anymore, so she should get my total concentration. It might help me get away with a few more years without amplification. Quite simply, if I give her my undivided attention, I shouldn’t need a hearing aid -yet! 

It took as long to get from downtown to the airport as it did to fly to Vegas (1 hr. 45 minutes). With some overhead power issues, they shut down the MAX half-way there, loaded us on a shuttle bus to the Blue Gresham bound train, and finally transferred us back to the Red. With our start on the streetcar, it was a 5-step Tri-Met sampler, utilizing all their public transportation options. It took all this plus two elevators, an escalator, handicap ramps, rough sidewalk maneuvering and good old-fashioned muscle to ultimately get our luggage to an Alaska Airline baggage handler. At least, they gave us a break on the extra pounds we packed. Despite all this hassle, we still had time for a Pot Belly sandwich as we waited to board.

The trip had started so smoothly, catching the streetcar and Airport train without any waiting. We were comfortably seated for about ten minutes before they abruptly dumped us off at a busy stop just over the bridge. It was shoulder-to-shoulder from that point on as we were herded like cattle from bus and train-to-train. The big wide smile on my wife’s face began to fade with each detour. Fortunately, the plane took-off even a few minutes early. Our last trip to Vegas was badly delayed, so thoughts of “here we go again” weighed heavily before we got through security unscathed. We were finally on our way.

Travel hassles are all part of the adventure, especially in unhurried retirement. There’s been some doozies through the years, including missed flights or connections, unexpected airport stops, car rental mishaps, rough seas, illness, overnights in airports, lost baggage, miss-booked hotel rooms, bad weather, accidents, and arguments. Flexibility is the best precaution – a luxury we now have without work schedules. Also, our dog Tally is about the only responsibility we can’t always take with us. There’s little reason why we can’t stay a few extra days. It’s only money!

Actually, I still pout and moan if things don’t go as planned. There’s no patience in these old bones, although I am contemplating a meditation course that a friend teaches. Perhaps, I can adopt some of Buddha’s philosophies in the process? In our recent travels to Thailand, we joked about the constant presence of gold statues celebrating Buddha and his often exposed rear end – “Buddha Butt.” When I brought this up at the recent breakfast meeting, the guy next to me claimed to have invented that religion. “I’m a plumber,” he quipped. I hope my Buddhist friends can overlook these crass butt-crack jokes, and I can learn the patient, forgiving ways of Buddhism. Maybe it can even fix my bladder problems?