The restaurant business has to be a competitive nightmare.  There are so many options to choose from, depending on whether you want just a quick bite or an experience.  My wife is always looking for an experience, while I just consider it fuel.  She loves to explore the menu, enjoy a glass of wine, ask questions, judge the presentation, savor the flavor, buy the cookbook, and talk about the experience.  I don’t look at the menu until the last minute, order a martini, devour all the bread, and feel like I’ve eaten too much when the bill comes.  If someone asks what I had to eat, even the next day, I won’t remember.  She, on the other hand, will take pictures, remember every course, experiment with one of the recipes, and discuss every detail, with whoever will listen, for years to come.  This is what makes dining-out a valuable investment for her.

The investment for me is watching her enjoy the show.  It’s just like going to a Broadway production, her other great passion.   She’ll research the performers, buy the music, listen to it on the way there and back, sit on the edge of her chair in anticipation of the next number, sing along, remember every word, wish that it goes on forever, and buy an autographed poster for her office.  I don’t have that kind of passion, even when it comes to sports.  I’ll put the game on my calendar, enjoy the build-up, watch the beginning, and lose interest until the final minutes.  If it’s a winning effort, I’ll want a souvenir for my home office.  If it’s a loss, it was simply a bad investment of time, and usually days of painful recovery until the next game comes along.  She doesn’t have that issue with Broadway.  It’s either a great performance with a show-stopping moment, or just a good show.   In any case, she leaves with a smile on her face, tapping along to a dance number, or singing a show tune.  Whether it’s dining or Broadway, I’m there for her, and she tries to reciprocate by attending a game with me, but would probably rather “set her hair on fire.”

Dining out is quickly becoming our largest monthly outlay of cash.  Our habits haven’t changed even with my recent retirement.  A good portion of our dining bill is my fault, with the cost of olives.  I typically try to limit myself to two drinks, and a sip or two of her wine, but sometimes, if I’m not driving, I’ll have a third.  I’m often disappointed any more in the presentation.  The traditional martini glass is being abandoned, in favor of less-vulnerable glassware, like coups.  It takes away from that “Great Gatsby” feeling of toasting the end of another successful day.  I order mine XXX – eXtra dirty, eXtra dry, eXtra olives, and particularly enjoy a blue cheese stuffed olive.  I like chips of ice floating on the surface, Tito’s Handmade vodka, a slightly cloudy mixture, and plump olives.  The “eXtra” olive is for my wife, unless the bartender comes through with the blue cheese stuffing.  I’m partial to Tito’s, having  watched the brand grow in popularity while living in Austin, Texas, and meeting the founder on several occasions, Tito Beveridge – a suitable name for his craft.   This is the sad extent of my role in the dining experience!

The next step after the martini is the bread, and how I typically judge the restaurant.   Joel Rubuchon in Las Vegas is by far the leader in this category, after delivering an actual bread cart to our table.  I’m partial to raisin and olive breads, and don’t believe in drowning out the flavor with butter.  This makes me a bread purist, especially enjoying softer breads that don’t challenge my retired teeth.  Our recent reservation at Alain Ducasse au Plaza Athenee in Paris may have jumped up to second in the bread category.  They sliced the French bread table side, using a custom wooden box to secure the loaves.  They did not have a cart, but quickly catered to my requests for more.  These two restaurants, by the way, were also in the top ten dining credit card charges, exceeding $750 for the two of us.  Yes, we also ordered a bottle of Sancerre and I had a couple of great martinis, served in the proper glassware.  This helped bolster the price on both occasions.  I would also have to say that French Baguettes are irresistible, even served from a food stand.

The most unusual presentation of food we ever experienced was at Alinea in Chicago.  I did not have a martini, electing instead to go with the wine pairings.  Oddly, I do not remember the bread, but was blown away by the dark entry hall where an entire wall opened to reveal the enclosed kitchen and the path into the dining room.   For a brief moment, I thought we were in the wrong place, but the welcoming waves of the kitchen staff set the stage for a fabulous dining experience.  It was also one of the top two charge card setbacks.  We were also fortunate to get a reservation at Per Se in New York City, and hope to get off the waiting list for Chef Thomas Keller’s other great restaurant, French Laundry, when we visit San Francisco next month.  I believe my largest investment in dining took place in Montpelier, France at a restaurant called Le Petit Jardin.  We paid for four meals plus several bottles of French wine, and unknowingly double-tipped.  In France, as we soon learned, the tip is typically included in the bill.  I was, however, greeted with many smiles of gratitude as we left that restaurant, realizing my several hundred euro mistake in generosity.

In our nearly 18 years together, my wife and I have jointly dined at over 1220 different restaurants.  This does not include our separate dining experiences associated with business trips and individual travel.  Our latest extravaganza was our fourth Outstanding in the Field dinner.  It’s our current annual tradition, once interrupted by relocation to Portland.   This year’s event was at the Jacobsen Salt Factory on Netarts Bay.  OITF, with an international reputation, pairs a local chef with local produce, and typically features a outdoor setting with a table for 100-300 people.  On this particular occasion we had great weather, but have also experienced unique situations where the actual dining was moved into the barn due to storms.  My wife has recently discovered Field & Vine dinners that are similar in nature, but done regionally here in Oregon.  She’s had me already sign up for three of them, quickly adding to our dining investment at $180-$200 per couple (includes wine but no martinis).

I mentioned in the first sentence of this article about the competitive nature of the restaurant business.  There’s fast food, cafes, diners, food trucks, pop-ups, and farm-to-table events that only add to the variety of choices we have in deciding where to spend our dining dollars (or euros).   Price and convenience are definitely factors, but loyalty is often sacrificed for variety.  My wife and I are guilty of this, as our weekly “Date Night” location is solely determined by where we’ve not yet dined.  This means that even if we have a memorable dining experience somewhere, we will probably not return unless company comes to town or there’s a special occasion to celebrate. We do, however, make lots of recommendations, as our “Date Night” tradition grows legendary.  If someone mentions a Portland area restaurant, chances are we’ve been there.  However, you can’t possibly keep up with all the changes unless you dine out every night, and that may be cost prohibitive. If you want to know about martinis and bread at a specific restaurant then ask me, but if you want all the details, and I do mean all, then ask my wife!

Cheers!