The closest I’ve come to a King is a Chess match or Spider Solitaire. The only time I’ve ever said the words, “King Me” is in an occasional game of Checkers. I was never Prom King or Homecoming King, so I’ve never worn a crown. I do however sit on the throne, preferably every day. Elvis was my modern day “The King,” while Burger King was once an advertising account, and the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King, a memorable tragedy in my lifetime. I’ve ridden the roller coaster at King’s Island, read thrillers by Stephen King, gone to Red Lobster for King Crab, listened to the music of B.B. King & Carole King, driven down King Street here in Portland, and slept on a King-sized mattress. Last but not least, I’ve had meals fit for a King and thankfully never fit in the King’s Clothing.

I’ve heard that it’s “Good to be the King.” In fact, someone once bought me a mug with that profound saying, but unfortunately it got broken in one of our many moves. I’m actually surprised that my wife hasn’t taken me to see the Broadway musical “The King and I,” but we did go see “The Lion King.” Oh, I take that back – apparently it’s part of the ticket package we just received from the Portland Broadway Series. Also, every time I look at the Empire State Building when we’re in Manhattan, I can’t help but think of King Kong monkeying around, and every cheap motel room seems to have a copy of the King James Bible, not to be confused with LeBron “King” James. Also in the wide world of sports, there’s Pele, the “King of Football” along with England’s Ledley King; Eddie Feigner of softball lore known as the “King and His Court” with 141,517 no-hitters, 141,517 strikeouts, and 238 perfect games; “The King of Clay,” Rafael Nadal; “King Felix” Hernandez of the Seattle Mariners; “King Carl” Hubbard of the baseball New York Giants; Bernard King of the NBA NY Knicks; King Kelly of the 1878 undefeated Cincinnati Reds; Female golfer Betsy King; Monday Morning Quarterback writer Peter King; Billie Jean King of “Battle of the Sexes” tennis fame; and NHL Hall of Fame player, referee, coach, & executive Michael “King” Clancy of the Toronto Maple Leafs. The L.A. Kings finally won a Stanley Cup in 2012, while the Sacramento Kings haven’t ruled the basketball court since 1951, but back then they were actually the Rochester Royals. Not Kings!

Without getting into the religious aspects of Christ the King, the most famous actual crowned head was probably King Arthur, who according to medieval histories and romances, led the defense of Britain against Saxon invaders in the late 5th and 6th centuries. Many details of Arthur’s story are mainly composed of folklore, including the legend of the sword. There are still 43 modern-day countries that have a royal family and 28 families or rulers over them. The richest King is Bhumibol Adulyadej of Thailand. Perhaps, I’ll go visit him and his $30 billion in March when we visit Bangkok and Phuket this spring. 92- year old Queen Elizabeth II has ruled Canada and the United Kingdom since 1952, and just recently allowed the legalization of cannabis. Prince Charles is heir apparent, so a King could soon be back in charge, if he’s not too stoned. Just kidding. Besides, Freddie Mercury may be the most famous Queen, and he broke all the royal rules. 

All this talk of Kings is really a result of my recent fascination with Game of Thrones (GOT). When I started the series earlier this week, there were Five Kings involved in a war to rule the Iron Throne, hence the name of the show. It’s based on the book A Song of Fire and Ice by George R. R. Martin, and  inspired by this poem from Robert Frost:

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I’ve tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.

The Five GOT Kings include: 

  • Joffrey Baratheon
  • Balon Greyjoy (He establishes independent kingdom – Iron Islands)
  • Robb Stark (He is proclaimed king of the North, after death of his father)
  • Stannis Baratheon.
  • Renly Baratheon (Renly also stakes a claim for the throne after winning support from Baratheon Bannermen)

So Far, three are dead, but heirs continue to fight for control of the Seven Kingdoms. Of the soon to be eight seasons of “Lannister World,” I’m nearly half-way there. Admittedly, I have some aspirations to be King, but I’m not even the head of our household – the Queen rules! My scepter today was the toilet brush, and my Royal duties included walking the Royal dogs, cleaning the Royal cat’s litter box, and applying Easy-Off to Her Majesty’s oven. Long Live The King, in the shadow of the Queen!