My wife and I went to see A Star is Born version 4 last night, and I couldn’t help but notice some parallels with my own life. As they say, a movie is better if you can relate to it. I do not recall seeing any of the previous versions, even though the 1976 Barbara Streisand production would have been difficult to avoid, despite my unpopular opinion about her voice. At that time, I was also leery of her co-star, Kris Kristofferson, because of my infatuation with his ex-wife Rita Coolidge. It is not uncommon for me to see movies and not remember a thing about them. This may be nothing more than one of those “Senior Moments,” especially considering it was 42 years ago.

I’m envious of successful writers, particular considering all my efforts that have gone unrewarded, with the exception of personal satisfaction. I love stories of hit songs, memorable speeches, artwork, and novel concepts penned on cocktail napkins and loose pieces of paper. I can relate to jotting down ideas in a notebook and bringing them into poetic form. I enjoy watching these often struggling artists suddenly achieve fame, as if it could someday happen to me. 

I also can relate to how relationships change lives. I’m not sure I would have ever achieved the career success that I enjoyed without the encouragement of my second and current wife. I also got to experience her meteorological rise in our business throughout our years together. I would like to think that the chemistry between us made us each better at the jobs we preformed. In addition, through our seventeen years of marriage, we’ve each made personal sacrifices to aid the other’s career.

I’ve always known through the years that she was the real STAR of the broadcasting business. I initially had the advantage because it was more of a man’s world back then, while women were just beginning to make leadership inroads. The biggest sacrifice she ever made was giving me a chance to run a broadcast property and accepting a demotion in her status to allow it to happen. With her on my staff, I began to really appreciate her full potential, but could see my personal handwriting on the wall. Honestly, the main reason why I excelled to that level was because of her skills in support. It was the pinnacle of my career, but also the beginning of the end for me. It was a couple years later when the station was sold and a transition took place in our roles. In a bit of a stretch, perhaps it was comparable to Jackson Maine and Ally.

My wife went on a new position in a new city, while I claimed unemployment checks and eventually went to work for a men’s clothing chain. I did not, however, turn to alcohol and drugs, although an occasional Shiner Bock hit the spot. As she continued to show even more promise in turning around her new station, I refrained from getting stumbling drunk and peeing my pants. Yes, there were times when I wanted to be in her spotlight, but I was always proud of her achievements.

There another issue that stood out in the movie, and that was a hearing problem. My wife is currently struggling with a bad cold that led to an inner ear infection. She could only hear half the movie. My hearing is slowly deteriorating, but I’ve fought against hearing aids. The last couple of weeks our conversations have consisted of a symphony of “what’s” and “say that again.” I could not clearly hear Ally’s spoken words in the movie, so I’m beginning to wonder what I’m missing in life? Another factor is my voice that feels strained after several vocal cord surgeries. This is all part of dealing with vanity as you grow older, and my throat and ear issues must be somehow related. They were also a strong consideration in my decision to retire, and stick to writing rather than speaking. 

I eventually found a better job, but that did not equate with satisfaction, despite some sales awards. She was then promoted to a larger TV market, and I started over once again. At that point, I was just a few years from a pension and social security, so I was not motivated to work beyond 65. I might have worked longer if my star had continued to shine, and so far my wife has maintained her lustrous sparkle.

By the way, I’m happy with my retirement, as it gives me more time to write. I’ll continue to wait for stardom in this new career quest, while my younger wife, the star, prepares for her retirement in a few years. I’m sure that she still sees me as the star that she married, so this marriage will not have the same tragic outcome as the movie. Hopefully, she’ll be able to hear me again soon!