After much deliberation, I have decided to contact my probable birth mother through her son. I believe to have found his current address, and will mail a certified letter tomorrow. I will also include the background information provided to me by the adoption agency through the Indiana State Department of Health, the home placement agreement from the adoption agency, the adoption paperwork from the Marion County Courts, listing me as Jerry Lee Bannister (once again with two n’s), and a photograph. I also provided a self-addressed stamped envelope for a reply, should they decide to acknowledge the connection. I feel that I should be contacting the birth mother directly, but I don’t have her current address, and I don’t know her level of health. I just know that given her age, I need to act quickly if there’s any chance of eventually getting together.  Here’s the slightly edited content of the letter:

Dear Jerry,

My name is Mike Johnston and I live in Portland, Oregon. You are probably wondering why I am writing? I have enclosed some sensitive information that I believe confirms that I might be related to you through your mother, Edna Faye Banister. I decided to contact you first and let you go through these documents.

I will tell you that I have known of this relationship for over 30 years, but it was only this last week that I found her birth certificate and a 1940 Census, confirming her location, the identification of her seven siblings (including the twins), and your relationship as her son.

As you look over this information, I understand that you could likely be skeptical and protective. My initial interest was to simply find a picture and avoid any direct contact, but my wife has encouraged me to at least contact you, to at least give Edna the choice. Also, she’s approaching 85 and only you would know if she’s in good enough health to handle this information. Another person close to me admitted that they were in a similar situation, and that it’s common for the kids to know nothing about it, so I’m sure that this may generate some initial shock on your part. I apologize for putting you in this position, and for possibly disrupting your family, but there’s a chance that Edna may want to at least know that I am happily married, healthy, comfortably retired, and have a 43 year-old son, who is about to give me a third grandchild. At this time, I want nothing more than to write her a note, should both of you be agreeable, and then decide if other steps should be taken.

I’ve included a self-addressed stamped envelope should you want to write me back, and my phone number is XXXXXXXXXX. I look forward to hearing from you.

 

Best Regards, Mike

 

I will continue to update you on any progress, as I nervously await any reply.